Someone once "defriended" me because she didn't like the competition in our group of friends. She actually defriended our whole group via me. That was fun.. not to mention totally unexpected. After pondering that situation and spending much time dissecting my responsibility in it, I came across a few realizations. My friends are my extended family. I don't have siblings to go to for advice so I go to my girls. I do not look at my friends like they are competitors, I look at them as resources. If I have a friend that has a beautiful house, I go to her for decorating advice, if I have a friend that is an awesome cook, I go to her for food advice. If I have a friend that is stylish, I go to her for fashion advice and so on. I would be crazy to give up any of my friends. I understand that sometimes in your life you come across that occasional toxic person, who starts out to be a friend, but ends up being an emotional vampire, and you have to end the friendship or the friendship dissolves on its own. This was not the case. I was hurt, shocked and felt like I had lost a part of my "extended family". In the end, I realized that in this situation, it was "her" and not me. I had to be okay with her decision and move on. I am still close with the group that she broke up with. They have been my "go to" girls and I am thankful for them daily.
I can't talk about friendship without bringing up my ABSOLUTE BEST BEST sister-friend Stacy, who knows more about me than I do myself, and I can't imagine life without her. Nothing could keep us apart, not miles, not marriage, not kids.. not nothing. We are soul twins, separated at birth (by a few years) and she means so much to me. We used to work together and after spending all day side by side, the first thing we did when we got in the car was call each other and talk they whole way home. It has been 20+ years and we are still that close. She lives across the country, but I do not hesitate to call her if I need her. She is usually (okay- always) the first one to know things about me and the family. I don't know the feeling of having a biological sister, but I do have a great understanding of the value of sisterhood thanks to her.
Like I said, I have close friends here, and they are involved in my day to day. I treasure them dearly and although they know me NOW, they don't have the historical perspective that Stacy has. That "before I was famous" place in my life that molded me into the person I am today. We have new memories, new stories, and strong relationships. I value them, and would be sad if they ever broke up with me. I think when Forrest Gump said "Life is like a box of chocolates" he really meant "Friends are like a box of chocolates". You never know what kind you'll end up with.. Some stick with you, some you realize you don't like when you open them- you eat them anyway, but are so glad when it's gone, and some are your favorites that you will savor forever....
Thank you ALL for the friendships- old and new. Anyone who can accept me for who I am has a special place in my heart and my life. ♥
2016 Was Good to Me
11 months ago